Once you’ve got a bad habit in a relationship, it can be hard to get out of it when you realize what you’re doing is a bad thing.
Worst of all, most of our bad habits can go unrecognized and seen as ‘nothing to worry about’. However, the reality is that these things could be having an adverse effect on your partner, causing your relationship to progressively deteriorate.
Read also: 10 Single Things you Must Do Before Getting Married
A lot of bad habits are actually very common in a lot of relationships; some of the most common ones are as follows:
Jealousy
Jealousy is the number one problem so many of us struggle with.
A small amount of jealousy is natural but should never be approached or discussed in a relationship unless the reason for jealousy is something that could really damage your relationship.
It may become habit for some people to pick up on every single thing your partner does and read into it too much.
Whether is it that they text someone, smile at someone, or for some even looking at another person can cause an argument; you should never pick this out as a reason to fight.
The problem is: By shouting about it every time your partner even breathes the same air as a member of the opposite sex, you will eventually become this really irritating partner that causes unnecessary drama and you will appear like you are putting too much pressure on them.
No relationship is going to be a good one if you spend half your time worrying about other people.
Resolution: Relax. If they wanted to be with someone else, they would be. Trust is the key to a successful relationship.
Buying your Way out of a Sticky Situation
A sympathy present without actually talking about any bad situation is an absolute ‘do not’. Although any normal person does love a gift, such as during special occasions or as random acts of kindness, it cannot be used as a replacement for an apology!
Ok, let’s get this straight. No woman or man wants to be bought presents and gifts as a way of saying “let’s forget about that massive argument we had earlier”, because what it’s really saying to your partner is “I can’t be bothered explaining myself or telling you what I did wrong so here is my pathetic apology.”
A sympathy present without actually talking about any bad situation is an absolute “do not”. Although any normal person does love a gift, such as during special occasions or as random acts of kindness, it cannot be used as a replacement for an apology!
The problem is: Communication is one of the most vital parts to maintaining a healthy relationship. Therefore, if you have got yourself into an argument or have done something you know was wrong, talking about it and showing your understanding is the only way to move on. Getting out of this habit should be easy enough to do if you learn how to talk properly and explain yourself.
Resolution: In your next sticky situation, sit your partner down and discuss the events that have happened and show your sincerity by vocally apologizing and doing all you can to win them over. If you really want to buy gifts, do this after you’ve apologized, and you and your partner have cleared the air about the whole incident.
Taking your Mood out on Them
Admittedly, it can be really irritating if your partner isn’t showing sympathy for your bad mood, but it’s even more irritating for them if you make them feel horrible just because you are feeling a bit moody.
So, you’ve had a bad day at work and you have come home to your partner and every little thing they do is making you more annoyed. And because of that, you decide to be snappy and put your bad mood on their shoulders, when they’ve done nothing wrong at all!
Admittedly, it can be really irritating if your partner isn’t showing sympathy for your bad mood, but it’s even more irritating for them if you make them feel horrible just because you are feeling a bit moody.
The problem is: Your relationship is meant to be a source of happiness. So, if you’re going home and being miserable and making your partner feel it too, you’re not doing either of you any favors. If you continue to put each other in bad moods, you will lose the ability to cheer each other up – which is the one thing you should be doing!
Resolution: Instead of being gloomy, show your partner that they have the ability to turn your frown upside down and give them a cuddle! You want to be in the situation where you can put your bad mood behind you, or talk it through with your partner and look for a solution – rather than using them as an excuse to be grouchier.
Forgetting to Make Effort
Your partner needs to know that they are still appreciated, so don’t forget to do the odd nice thing for them to make them smile. It is easy to tell your partner that you love them, but it’s showing it that so many of us forget to do.
It’s the little things in a relationship that make it special. It’s all well and good doing the small things to make each other smile in the process of getting together, but just because you’ve got them, it doesn’t mean you should suddenly stop making the effort.
The problem is: Although we live busy lives and don’t always remember to do something special for or with our partners, it is crucial that you attempt it to show compassion. Your love life will suffer if you’re not making effort with each other or giving one another a reason to be happy.
Resolution: Plan a date night or leave a nice message in their lunchbox – the little things that show you’ve thought about them can really make their day.
Too Much Time Together
When you’ve done a lot together, it can become habit to see each other everyday or very often and spend barely anytime apart with friends and family. Not only is it agitating for those you don’t get chance to see anymore, it can also become agitating for you when you see your partner too often.
Not only is it agitating for those you don’t get chance to see anymore, it can also become agitating for you when you see your partner too often.
The problem is: Spending every living day together can result in losing any excitement you get when seeing each other. You will become used to seeing one another and eventually you will start taking them for granted.
A relationship is meant to be cherished and considered very special. However, if you are together all the time and have no chance alone, you will slowly become part of a relationship that loses its spark.
Resolution: Have some time apart, see your friends and allow yourself to get some space. Once you’ve had time apart you will start to miss each other and spending time together will be exciting – just like it used to be!
The last thing you want for your relationship is for it to die out for silly reasons that can easily be changed and improved.
Getting rid of your bad habits will have an incredibly positive effect on your relationship, this will make you both stronger and you will appreciate each other much more than you did when you took your bad moods out on each other!