Divorce can have a positive impact on children because they are being freed from unhealthy family life. This allows them to have more choices in life which often results in a more happier and fulfilled adulthood for them.
The effects of divorce on children tend to be mixed, but mainly negative. This is due to the fact that separation is always accompanied by many stressful factors, such as economic problems, changes in schools, dealing with the separation of mom and dad.
These changes put a strain on the child. Kids of divorced parents are more likely than kids of married parents to suffer from behavioral problems and delinquency. They are also more likely to engage in premarital sex and use drugs.
Divorce can be rough on kids especially when they are young. But there are also many ways children can benefit from a divorce which you might not have heard of.
Most of the time both parents are happier
When life as a couple falls apart, it is very difficult to continue being a happy and smiling person – or even just pretend.
But it may be that the two halves of the “blown out” couple find their serenity in the long run by moving forward on their own, as individuals. And for children, it is important to have a mom and a dad finally at peace with themselves.
Children of divorced parents have a better grasp of what life is all about
A recent study has found that children of divorced parents are more likely to have a better understanding of life.
For example, when they are able to witness their mothers and fathers live in two different lifestyles, it helps them grow up with the understanding that there are many ways in which one can live their life.
Children who come from divorced parents often have an advantage when it comes to learning about life because they have seen firsthand what is involved in being in love with someone one day and then not being in love the next day.
Adults from divorced parents don’t take marriage for granted
People who come from divorced parents don’t take marriage for granted. They have a new sense of appreciation for the union of two people.
They also see the importance of how to work with others to solve their problems. Plus, if their parents were stubborn about staying together for them, they will be more likely to take initiative in their lives and stand up for what they want.
Children who come from divorced parents are more likely to see family life as what is best for them. They don’t understand the concept of family as something that only makes the parents feel.
Their sense of responsibility about being part of a family is better than that of children who come from married parents.
Divorce can bring out the best in kids
Divorce can sometimes bring out the best in children especially older children who have siblings.
In a study done at Texas A&M University, Dr. Jerry Burger found that children from divorced homes had better grades, happier social lives, and more confidence than kids from other kinds of family structures.
In the study, researchers examined 1,800 middle-class students over nine years and found that the quality of their grades and social interactions was higher when they came from a divorced household than when they lived with both biological parents.
There is no more tension in the house
It is well known that children suffer a lot in situations of tension: hypothetically it would be possible to measure the level of nervousness that winds around the house by observing only their behavior.
Once the separation is effective, the tension in the home subsides, and the children’s mood improves as a result: they are less directly involved in conflicts and are no longer forced to take the side of one or the other parent, or the other.
Divorce can have a positive effect on kids by creating stronger bonds between siblings
Divorce is a difficult process that has the potential to rip families apart. In some cases, siblings are left with an empty nest and only each other.
But sometimes, divorce can bring a family closer together as they share their experience and help each other through the turmoil. While divorce can be difficult for many family members, siblings may find that they form a stronger bond with their brothers and sisters because of the experience.
“I think what really brought us closer together is the fact that we had to support each other during these hard times. It’s almost like we were stuck in this boat together,” said Kelly Evans, who was forced to move in with her sister, Kimberly Evans-Lopez, after her parent’s divorce.
Children learn to become more self-reliant
Another lesson kids learn from parental divorce is to become more self-sufficient as they’re often left to care for themselves.
Often, children from divorced families are more resilient and less needy than those who grew up with two parents in the home. This is because of the frequent adjustments they must make as a result of their parent’s divorce.
Generally, children face a difficult situation when a divorce becomes a reality. However, they seem to be more prepared to handle the problems and disappointments that increase as a result of their parent’s divorce.
Kids from divorced families depend more on themselves; they learn how to take care of themselves and become less needy.
Children from divorced parents are likely to develop empathy for others
Divorce is difficult for children, but it doesn’t always affect them negatively and it can beneficial to most of the kids.
Along with gaining empathy for others, children from divorced parents often develop skills that help them become more accomplished in life.
Along with developing empathy, many children from divorced parents also learn skills that help them become accomplished adults in the future.
For instance, they may acquire better communication skills or they may develop an increased awareness of what makes people happy or sad.
Children can enjoy one parent at a time
Sometimes in a family, almost all the burden of childcare and entertainment falls on one parent, or on none as they are both distracted and exhausted by their diatribes.
On the other hand, after the divorce, children can sometimes enjoy the exclusive attention of one of the parents who take care of them 100%, having moreover the mind more oriented towards the children rather than on her personal problems.
Children are able to learn useful conflict resolution skills
Divorce can be a trying time for children and parents alike but it doesn’t have to be.
Yes, the initial stages of the breakup may be rough as parents work through their difficult emotions and decide on custody arrangements, but there are many skills that children can learn from their divorced parents.
One such skill is conflict resolution which is crucial in relationships both inside and outside of the family unit. And this skill is something that we can instill in our children and we can learn from our children as well.
Children and their parents can enjoy more quality time together
Many more people are getting divorced these days, but what does this mean for children?
Many kids from divorced families end up spending more time with each parent after the divorce, which gives them a better chance of having a stronger relationship with both parents.
This is one of the benefits that some experts say can come from holding on to something positive in an ugly situation like divorce.
“We definitely think that kids in divorced families tend to have very positive relationships with both of their parents,” said education professor Dr. Andrew Grogan-Kaylor. “
Conclusion
Divorce or parental separation doesn’t always affect children negatively. Of course, that’s a bad thing in general, but while it’s a clear and mature choice based on solid reasons, it also has positive aspects that children can benefit from.
Children are able to positively benefit from their parents’ divorce by learning from their mistakes, which can give them a better insight into their own lives. It should teach them to do the opposite of what their parents did wrong, so they can avoid doing the same mistakes.
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